Thursday, February 21, 2008

Ooooh! Great licence Universal!

The film studio Universal have licensed 4 games from Hasbro to make into movies. They include Monopoly and Battleships.

Monopoly. And. Battleships.

They have licensed them to make them into movies..

Seriously. This isn't a joke. They've paid Hasbro money for the licences.

Some of you probably remember the 80s movie Clue, which was based on Cluedo. Now, the thing about Cluedo was that the game revolves around a murder mystery and murder mysteries are a well understood genre of film. And it was funny. And quite clever. I liked it.

How on earth do you make a movie out of Monopoly? You have a little dog and an iron running around a city buying streets and building hotels? Hours of tedium after one player gets a bit ahead of everyone else and very, very slowly drains money and streets from their rival. They'll have stupid characters named stuff like Mr Iron won't they. Or they'll have a guy in a top hat, and a guy with a sports car and a woman who likes ironing. Maybe they'll employ Jeremy Irons. Or Snoop Dogg.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH.


Will the movie cause families to destroy each other like the real game?

And Battleships? Ok so war movies, and sea war movies are a well known genre but what can the game licence bring to the film? I can't think of anything. The only good sea based war movies were made well over 30 years ago when the WWII footage they cut in with the real footage didn't look old and out of place. Look at Pearl Harbour, millions spent on shit CGI and a rubbish movie.

Hasbro must be laughing all the way to the bank.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am guessing you always lost at Monopoly and this has left you bitter and twisted on the subject. I think its a great idea it has all the ingredients for a top film. Jails, free parking, winning £10 in a beaty competition etc etc.

Mike said...

Damn, you're right. I did. Shut up.

Anonymous said...

WTF was Cluedo? The name of the game was Clue. Don't believe me? Ask yourself, did they name the movie Cluedo? No, they didn't.

Cluedo. I bet it didn't even have a Mr. Mustard, but a Mr. Mayonnaise instead.

Mike said...

It was Cluedo in England. And it was Colonel Mustard.