Ummmmmm

Here at Lazy View, we sometimes like to cover fat people. Fat people are, at least on some level, lazy by nature. Either they're fat because they're lazy, or they're lazy because they're fat. In the case of the "glandular" fatties they have lazy glands.

Today we have a story about the world's fattest man. See, he's not actually the world's fattest man anymore. He's lost 400 pounds, and now he's out on the town. In a bed. With a mariachi band.

I don't even really know how to comment on all that this story contains. It just sets my mind racing. I'm just gonna make a list of some "Points of Interest" and let everyone draw their own conlcusions.

1. He lost 440 pounds and still weighs 800 pounds.
2. He has people roll him around on a bed while a mariachi band plays.
3. He had a date.
4. He needed a forklift for said date.
5. His rollerbed truck drove into a bridge on the way to the date and broke, thereby ruining his date.
6. He's alive somehow.
7. He has a girlfriend.

I'm torn between 6 and 7 being the most unbelievable points of interest. To say I was gobsmacked at 7 is an understatment. I'd sooner believe that Hillary Clinton is actually a woman before I believe that. Unless they meant to say: "Had a date with...." and then mentioned that his girlfriend was a ham sandwich.